Innlegg

Viser innlegg fra juli, 2017

A scary night!

When the evening on saturday neared it's end I had to change my insulin equipment. This is not rare, I do it once every three or four days. It's much easier than the equipment I used before I gor my insuline pump. Before that I had to tak seven shots, every day. Two in my thigh and five in my stomach. Everything seemed okay so I went to bed. I woke up at half past four in the morning and I was drenched in sweat. I went to the bathroom to get a towel, but before I got to the towels I heard an alarm from my insuline pump. It told me there was some sort of blockage between the pump and me. I was nautius and had a bad taste in my mouth. I changed some of the equipment, but not all. I got some food and water and thought about calling the doctor on duty. When I had just finished eating I got the same alarm again! Then I switched all of the equipment and called the doctors office. I set a dose of insuline. The nurse on the phone seemed pleasant and did everything she is suppo

Are you prepared to support?

When you have a friend who is sad or depressed it is easy to say that you are there for them. This might be something you say just to comfort them and it might work! But are you prepared if they try to talk to you about what's on their mind? Having a friend who struggles is not easy. You have an important role to either play or pass. Not everyone is emotionally ready to take that role. However if you choose to say that you're there for your friend, you should be ready. It is terrible if your friend has told you you can talk to them, just to meet someone who shows no interest or someone who talks about your problems like if they were insignificant.  You might be in for a ride. They might be really happy, one moment and suicidal the next. Show you want to hear what they have to say. Don't say things like you've been in a worse place, had worse times or like you know exactly how they feel or how it is to be them. These things may lead to your friend not feeling

I am lucky!

I'm lucky to live in a part of the world where I can be myself. I can do the things I want to do. I can go to school, I can live how I want, I can be with the people I want, I can think what I want and say what I want. Norway is a country that helps the people who live here. Not always perfect, but better than many other countries. Thanks to help from the gouvernment I got equipment so I could go to school, study and learb to love knowledge. I'm able to practice and work with Martial Arts, despite being blind. This is thanks to the system and wonderful people I'm lucky enough to get to meet. I'm so lucky with my work. I travel around Norway, doing one of the things I love - Martial Arts. I get to help make it easier for people with different disabilities to start and continue practicing Martial Arts.  Traveling is one of my favourite things to do. Meeting people, experiencing new places, new smells and taste new food. I travel mostly in Norway, which is great

Feeling like no one cares!

It is a terrible feeling. Something I feel from time to time. I know iy's not true, but it is something that rises in my mind at times. Feeling lonely, abandoned and left all alone. When I mention this to the people I usually talk to they tell me it's stupid of me to think like that. I agree it's a stupid thought, but it does not help to be told it when the thought is present.  When I'm happy it's clear to me that there are many people who care a great deal about me, but when it's a bad period it's difficult seeing the care and love around me. Bpth friends and family care for me and I care for them. They show this by asking me questions, talking to me giving me a hug and many other ways. When I am in bad periods I tend to focus on people I've lost touch with, or people who don't seem to care, and not all those who care.  Another thing I fobus on, in these periods, is when there is a tiny gap of time without people answering me. This is not

A break from social media?

I did it earlier this year, and I'm concidering doing it again. A break, or vacation if you will from social media. The last time I did this was in May. I onlu did it for two weeks, but it had the effect I wanted! I felt it took too much of my time and I felt it became too negative. I felt stress and pressure because of it. I did it by deleting all the social media apps I have except for the app I use for chatting with my friends.  If I do it again I am uncertain of how long my break will last. I feel it is back to taking up too much of my days as well as stressing me out. I feel the need to check if anything has happened several times each hour. This is time I could spend on relaxing, walking, thinking and taking care of myself.  I recommend everyone at least try to take breaks. Just try it and see how it feels. If you don't like it there is no need to do it for long, but there is a chance it might do you some good! When I did it it was the most difficult in the beg

Wondering

At this moment I'm sitting in my livingroom, wondering what to write about. Suddenly I came up with the idea to just write without a clear goal. I'm in a state of mind where there is nothing wrong, but I still have a need to write something. This weekend I spent with my parents on a mountain. It was a nice trip and the best part is getting away from the city for a little while. It is so quiet and peacefull and it really gave me a chance to think. I think I'll write a bit about some of my thoughts. The first thing that came to mind was how luvky I am to live in a country that is not in war and a country that has a great system to help the inhabitants. The economic system is far from perfect, but it is great. In any system there are holes and things that can be improved, but thanks to the Norwegian systems I am able to live a life in which I can be myself, get an education and have a social life. I can even have the amazing job I have. There are people in Norway wh

Losing is not losing!

When I teach Martial Arts to kids I like to ask them what is most important. They often give me the answer "winning". If they give me that answer I tell them, no. I tell them the two most important things is being friends with the other students and never giving up.  I've lost many times in many different ways, but I do not view it asa big loss. The biggest loss to myself would be if I gave up. If I let myself stay down after something knobked me down. I try to always get up and keep moving on. When I move forward in my life I am happy. I often take long ways to get just a bit forward, but the journey is giving me so much. I am happy to learn. I learn a lot from my mistakes, and a lot from losing competitions or other endevours.  It's not easy to continue is you feel like yjere is no hope. In my mind there is always hope. I like to say that if there is life there is hope. I might not be able to fly by myself, but thanks to the inventions of mankind, I can s

What is wrong with me?

This is a question that sometimes jumps into my head. It may happen to you as well. The answer is that there is nothing wrong with us. I have physical troubles because of disease and other things, but when this question rises it is rarely directed towards the physical part of ne.  You are much more than just your body. You are your thoughts, your hopes, your dreams and much more. You are your present self, but also the future self that may be anything you want. It is important to remember that the future is not set in stone. You can steare it in the direction you want it to take.  I try to live my life as an open, active and happy person. I also try to let unknown things happen to me by taking chances. If you don't want to take chances this is completely up to you, and fine. You should live the life you want. In my case a lot of wonderful things have occured because of coincidences and me taking risks or chances. If I feel like there is something wrong with me I talk

Dark thoughts

They are difficult. The range of dark thoughts are endless, no one are the same. I've had issues with this. Strong issues. It does not help to be told things could be worse. It does not help being told to look on the bright side. These things just makes it worse. In my case when I was told these things I still had the same thoughts as well as feel egoistic and insignifficant. I have written about this before, but it is really important to me so I choose to take the liberty to write about it again. I'm out of the constant darkness, but there are still days where the darkness envelops me.  Anything can trigger dark thoughts. This should be respected. It might seem petty or vein to outsiders, but it might hold great value to you. You should allow yourself to be sad and cry. However, I will ask you to do something to try and help yourself. You might not be able to, right now, but you should think about it when you are able. No one will ever know exactly how it is to